Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Clouds in My Sunshine

Things are going very well for me and my family, I would say, but somehow I tend to dwell on the little gray clouds in my sunshine. The following are a few of my gray clouds:

- Preschool. Yeah...after that great first day of school, things went a little down hill from there. The second week, Braelyn was crying and saying that she didn't like school, and she wanted to stay home with me. It was awful. On Friday, I walked her up to the drop-off and the principal had to pick her up and carry her into the building. She was crying, calling my name, reaching for me, the whole bit. She seems to be doing okay once she's there, but gets a little nervous during transitions. Mrs. Cone said it could be like this till Christmas. Oh Lord, help me!

- The Garden. All my indoor seedlings are dead. My baby basil plants were doing pretty well until I started taking them outside for a little sun bathing each day. Now...dead. A few things seem to be growing outside in the garden, which is hopeful. I have a few onions, a few carrots. There might be some lettuce growing, but I'm not totally sure. Could just be weeds. It's hard to tell sometimes. In fact, my marigolds were growing so well, I thought they were weeds, so I pulled them. I have since replanted them, and they are again doing well. I'm still deciding what I want to do about the indoor seedlings. Should I try again? Ugh, I don't know. To be honest, I didn't really like having them in my house. I like taking care of my garden outside. Not inside.

- The Homemade Christmas Plan. The plan has failed. I have not kept my commitment to make a gift a month. I have 2 gifts done. That's it. So now I'm forced to kick it up to a gift a week, which is still a reasonable goal. I think I am going to put a Christmas Countdown thing in the sidebar with the number of gifts I have left to go. Yes...I will humiliate myself into knockin' those babies out. By November people! By November! Make me do it!

- Working Out. A few months ago, I joined the gym. It started out great. I was going. Toning up. Felling good. But, then we went out of town or something and it ruined me. I can't seem to make myself go. And the thing is, I like working out, I just like doing the other things I'm doing more, like watching our shows, and blogging and reading and hanging out with my family and friends. It's a real conundrum.

- Getting Pregnant. We're still not. I suppose that's one of my rainier clouds.

Silly clouds. They are but vapor. If I would just stand back a little, I would see a sky full of sunshine. I shall end this post with gratitude...

I am thankful for:

- Making new friends.
- Seeing our church grow, in both width and depth.
- Having people in my home...everyday
- Catching up with old friends.
- Having a Date Night again (Thanks Beth!)
- College students
- Feeling the Lord disrupt that complacency that was settling in my soul
- Family gatherings
- Beth Moore Bible studies (It's been a while since I've done a BM study, but I've just started one again with a friend, and man...a little Beth Moore'll do ya good! :)
- Big Sunday lunch
- Blogs that get me thinkin'
- And most of all..."But when the goodness and loving kindness of God our Savior appeared, He saved us, not because of works done by us in righteousness, but according to His own mercy, by the washing of regeneration and renewal of the Holy Spirit, whom He poured out on us richly through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that being justified by His grace we might become heirs according to the hope of eternal life." Titus 3:4-7


mandi said...

oh my those clouds can distract! i know that too well myself.

i say try your seedling again. it's not too late for that! and with the cooler temps you can start them outside- in the shade. full shade, no sun. and make sure they stay moist. my indoor seedlings got too leggy and died too, but my outdoor starters are looking really good. and i just started them last week. just give it a try, what's there to lose, right?

and about sweet ms. b, follow your heart there girl. and i know we're not supposed to follow our hearts, but i more mean your mama instincts. if it's not working, do what works.
but then, i'm no dr. i'm basically just sharing MY opinion!

Jenny said...

We are still trying for another little one too. I look at Sophia all the more tenderly and thankfully but I add a prayer that I won't be a smothering mommy. Thank you for being so honest in all your sharing. Sorry for y'all and Braelyn's hard time right now. I still can't get Sophia to part from me for Sunday School. I know, I know, it has got to be done for her sake. She loves playing with her "fends" (friends).

Abba's Girl said...

Plant lettuce in Nov or so, I plant it as well as spinach, brocoli and sometimes cauliflower in large pots, they can take a lot of cold weather.

You're entitled to look at your clouds but not live underneath them, you live under the Son Shine!

Thanks for your comment about Carol, I was smiling, laughing and crying as I wrote it.

I love you so much!

Alicia said...

Don't sweat the preschool anxiety. Almost all kids go through that at some point. Noah did when he started school too. Started crying when I left. Continued for a few weeks, but he got over it. I even called during the day to check on him and he was fine once he got going. B will be fine. :) I know it pulls on those mommy heartstrings, but I think we worry more than they do!